ENTRY #1756
8/31/10

THE SONG: Happy Birthday, Altered Images
THE PLACE: earth
THE WORD: It's your day, Rickky! Hot Butter Knife someone!

P.S. Reda said if you were up for it, he would date you.

ENTRY #1755
8/27/10

THE SONG: Fade Into You, Mazzy Star
THE PLACE: earth
THE WORD: ere I go.....

Thanks Thiebaud. You'll have "ruined the market" on your photo in the skateboard high school yearbook. Oh, and maybe "wrote bad poems" too. And don't try to take this up with Spike when you run into him, he acts like he's listening but then texts me and we laugh at you.

"Ripping Off Sanger's Style" #29: Bob Marley.

Mikey explained to me today his current big dilemma. The new 7 series and the mandatory package it comes with. I feel so bad thinking about the pressure of his job. Just breathe deep Mikey, God will help you make the right choice.

Hershel, take care of that hair style. Take a look around the office, we have a "No Tolerance" on high hair for men at Girl. We let Peter rock that pompadour for years and then he caught on.

ENTRY #1754
8/24/10

THE SONG: Happy Birthday, Stevie Wonder
THE PLACE: earth
THE WORD: Michael Carroll

Go fuck yourselves. At least when I don't post for a solid week it's because I literally almost died.

Happy Birthday to the hardest working VP in all of VP history. Love you Mikey.

ENTRY #1753
8/11/10

THE SONG: Exhausted, Foo Fighters
THE PLACE: yep
THE WORD: earth

ENTRY #1752
8/9/10

THE SONG: Mine, Taylor Swift
THE PLACE: here
THE WORD: I already said, mine

First things first, thanks for updating your column, Sanger. You landed on Team Fucker, pal.

Wizard Ben finally came in and saw his remodeled office. He said, "it's way worse then I had thought". Hersh, Chuck, Tough Guy, nice work team. The bummed looked on his face can only be matched by our Championship next year!

"Ripping Off Sanger's Style" #28: Robert Plant, pre 1983.

ENTRY #1751
8/4/10

THE SONG: Love the Way You Lie, Eminem
THE PLACE: yep
THE WORD: nice pull

Saturday, Jenkins and Spike were saying that sometimes when you're an asshole, as you get older you become more of an asshole. Just sayin'.

Mikey and I have been working together on "window treatments". What? You already know we're the gayest company in all of skate. Anyways, Mikey, I was thinking this for the guest room in case the Colen's come over?

Rickk's entire family has 2% body fat. Euro freaks.

Sometimes it's fun to just find out about what the brand you own really means, where is stands and if it's pure.

“Lakai is pure skate; whereas Element is a core skate brand extending into enviro-focused lifestyle footwear,” said a Billabong spokesperson.

ENTRY #1750
7/29/10

THE SONG: Never Say Never, Justin Bieber
THE PLACE: near by
THE WORD: whatever

Oh, you don't just call it "Bong"? Yeah, neither do we, fuckhead.

ENTRY #1749
7/27/10

THE SONG: Walk Away, Black Sabbath
THE PLACE: whatever
THE WORD: who cares

Wizard Ben, guess who's birthday it is today? Yep.




Hey Sanger, Spike is king of Team Fucker and now you know why? It wasn't even a pool party and when I left he said, "you're lame and being a shitty friend". If you want to turn on him together, call my assistant and we'll meet about it. (Meza's extension is 120).

I figured out what Transgender Hersh does when he's not surfing the web. He fills out "Request for Time Off" forms. Hersh, do me a favor, make a little sketch of when you WILL be here. Thanks buddy.

Rickk explained to me who "Drake....the rapper guy" is. Thanks pal. I'm in a silent completely black pod when I'm not here at Girl.

ENTRY #1748
7/26/10

THE SONG: Three Little Birds, Bob Marley
THE PLACE: a tree
THE WORD: nice

Ladies, guess who's little dumpling of an ass is off the market? That's right, EA popped the question to his lucky gal. Congrats to both of them. (Hey EA, no first dance at the wedding to "Road to Joy". That would be gay).




"One foot in the grave and the other on a banana peel".

ENTRY #1747
7/23/10

THE SONG: Pool Party, Randy Newman
THE PLACE: i don't know, Spike
THE WORD: i don't know, Spike

"Ripping Off Sanger's Style" #27: John McEnroe. I like his style of sportsmanship. Sort of a combo of Frosty and Rickk combined with a little dash of Rasheed Wallace.

Speaking of Sanger, how about updating your column, before you become a standing member of Team Fucker? Thanks buddy.

Finally Thiebaud and I had a mature text exchange. No name calling, no accusations, no having to tell him to stop pricing items at a rate that will sink the small aspect of the industry that still stands. It was really special. Memorable some might say.

Oh, yeah, you guys are totally handling that thing, BP. Don't even worry about it, it's fine.

ENTRY #1746
7/19/10

THE SONG: That's A Great Song, Ben Harper
THE PLACE: not that song
THE WORD: sorry.

Ben, seriously, come to your new Laker office. It's the bedroom every little Laker fan wished they were lucky enough to ever have. Or if you have two teams, like say, Frosty, it is half the room you wish you ever had. Or if you have three teams, like say The Jefferson's, it is about a third of the office you wished for. Either way, come in, it's beautiful and pretty permanent.

Mikey, are you still single? This girl looks like a blast. If you're not, Spike are you? Trampoline in a dress? She's crazy.

The cap BP put on the leak is now leaking but the good news is, "it's nothing to worry about". Cool. That's awesome.

Bird wants to ask the women of Hermosa to wear a cover up if "you're just going to let all your shit hang out". He's the best guy ever for PSA's.

Chick? Really? You have to stop being so cute. It's too much.

ENTRY #1745
7/13/10

THE SONG: Conversation, Alberto Igelsias
THE PLACE: shut up
THE WORD: shut up

Looks like you know who to pick first when we're picking softball teams this year, Tough Guy. Oh, and productivity? Why should I be worried about that? Rickk's in the skatepark with
a French bulldog and Mikey's walking around showing people of photos of his remodel. We're fine!

Carnalag and Hershel, leave french fries on the coffee table again Hersh is fired. I know Hersh, seems unfair but life isn't fair and I can tell you haven't learned that lesson yet. But, we will have
a going away party for you when you're fired. Cool?

ENTRY #1744
7/12/10

THE SONG: One Day At A Time, Tupac
THE PLACE: earth
THE WORD: i yie yie!

I got a moving violation that I am going to fight in court. I hope the judge likes tears because that's my ammo.

Does anyone want to trade one of Spike's moon men for a really cool bike or something? (Settle down, Jonze, let's see what we get as offers before we get in a fight).

"Ripping off Sanger's Style" #26: Coolest drummer ever, Charlie Watts.

Hey Tough Guy, unless you want me to let Wizard Ben decorate your office when The Kings get eliminated next year, can we get a jump on decorating his office? He's got a newborn, he's exhausted, do you understand how bummed he'll be if he comes into the masterpiece that we had originally planned? And Hersh, you were Committee Chair for this project. You're fired.

ENTRY #1743
7/9/10

THE SONG: Everything is Fine, Josh Turner
THE PLACE: everywhere
THE WORD: duh!

Ever wonder if you could be the V.P. of a company or even the V.P.'s favorite employee? Ever wonder how we stay afloat?

ENTRY #1742
7/2/10

THE SONG: 4th of July, Soundgarden
THE PLACE: USA
THE WORD: go nuts

Spike's in Yemen.

Waved to Mikey last night but didn't speak to him.

Rickk upstairs bumming that Ghana got eliminated.

Have a Happy safe 4th of July!

ENTRY #1741
6/30/10

THE SONG: Change The World, Eric Clapton
THE PLACE: earth
THE WORD: We're standing by, Wendy. Love you

I should probably talk this over with my partners but if anyone at Billabong wants to buy us, and when I say "us", you get Spike too, give me a call or email The Mez. You own everything else, might as well take us over. We're hard workers and half of us have never even cried in the building. Five of us know CPR and how to save a choking person and seven of us are forklift certified.
And the cherry on this deal, Mikey. Please.
I know it seems unaffordable and too good to be true but give it a shot.

ENTRY #1740
6/29/10

THE SONG: Cute, Count Basie
THE PLACE: here
THE WORD: Chick.........dammit.

Hersh, your ice dildo is still in the fridge, it just doesn't have the sock on it. Take it home or get a frat freezer in your office. It's not fair to the rest of us.

Chick is still cute, in case you've been wondering.

ENTRY #1739
6/28/10

THE SONG: Talkin' To Myself, Eminem
THE PLACE: my office
THE WORD: yep

Got an update from The Beauty and The Beast Tour. Spike got sick, Malto got 3rd, one guy on Anti Hero got into a scary collision and Rickk was scared and they're camping in the center of the Swedish Coachella.
Yeah, Mez, I have to do skate updates because you're just sunning yourself in Copenhagen, dude.

In Paris, Spike told me that Thiebaud tried to break down how he prices completes and Spike was laughing because he only asked to pile on that I called him out. But either way I told Spike the market for completes might recover in about two seasons from Jim's shot calling.

This is what I've been working on all day, helping this chick find Mark or Sean or whatever.

Where do you exchange your foreign money if you forget to do it at the airport? Email The Mez and he'll let me know.

I don't think we've ever posted photos of Rickk's older brother, Sven. He's a sculptor that lives in Toronto. Much more gentler and no hand or foot sweat.

ENTRY #1738
6/24/10

THE SONG: Looking for Nothing, Aimee Mann
THE PLACE: nowhere
THE WORD: nothing

Spike's super cool.

I'm always surprised that they really have FRENCH fries and FRENCH manicures in France. Those both seemed like ideas that were hatched in Huntington Beach.

Wizard Ben, did you ever think I would post a photo of Paul Pierce in my column? Even in France, I don't forget who the World Champs are, Ben.

Mez, if you're just going to post a photo and a quote, people will think we're going out of business. Stop fucking around. FYI, check with Jeremy, I fake fired him last week just to scare him.

ENTRY #1737
6/18/10

THE SONG: I Love L.A., Randy Newman
THE PLACE: not Boston
THE WORD: what up, Ben?

Roger, can you check with Hersh about documenting the decorating of Ben's office. We had a detailed meeting about it today and thought you would be the best candidate to cover it. Thanks buddy. And check with Mikey but posting on Facebook about burning things down is a Girl "no no". Thanks Rog.

Wizard Ben, it's going to be a long long sweet purple and gold summer. Your office will not disappoint.

"Ripping Off Sanger's Style": #25 Phil Jackson

ENTRY #1736
6/17/10

THE SONG: Banana Pancakes, Jack Johnson
THE PLACE: San Diego
THE WORD: Larson, handle that freak

Wizard Ben, I feel a decorating party coming on..........it's so purple and so gold. Check your crystal ball, tell me what you see. (Chuck, Party City, pronto).

Cooper and Callaway are forwarding me emails that just say "FYI" and "WTF". You guys, "OMG". Fags.

Someone did email and ask who made the pants Spike was wearing in that video the other day. He's a young celebrated Hollywood director, I'm guessing Rag and Bone? Spike?

Mikey asked me not to tell anyone that he and Rickk discussed what they were packing for the Beauty and The Beast trip. Kidding, right? Bring your little dogs, that would be so cool! And if you
happen to be on the Beast side of this trip and read this, don't judge. They've been side by side for two decades, things happen.

ENTRY #1735
6/16/10

THE SONG: Tomorrow Night, B.B. King
THE PLACE: Staples
THE WORD: yep

he only thing we care about is not caring? Stop it, Mez. That's ridiculous.

Wizard Ben, I just wanted to apologize for Zoey being the youngest person to ever get thrown into this Lakers/Celtics mix. Don't blame June, she was just the messenger.
Here's some tickets I found for you.

I don't know anyone that's going to a rave in July.

ENTRY #1734
6/15/10

THE SONG: Solo Dolo, Kid Cudi
THE PLACE: Staples
THE WORD: Rickk

Pao, any chance you can rebound and not forget that your 7 feet tall. Thanks, fucker.

No, those are not Lakai pants.




"Ripping Off Sanger's Style": #25 Darby Crash, R.I.P.

ENTRY #1733
6/14/10

THE SONG: Time is Running Out, Muse
THE PLACE: LA
THE WORD: Pao....big goof set up.

Mikey, can you call me? We're about to be in a pretty big fight. Probably starting around 8 tonight?

Wizard Ben, my sister sent me an email asking what I would do with you if the Celtics beat the Lakers in the finals. I said, "fire him". She said, "that would be funny". Runs in the family!

Holy fuck, River has grey hairs! He was like, 11 when he started working here. I yie yie!

"Ripping Off Sanger's Style": #24 Jacques Cousteau.

ENTRY #1732
6/11/10

THE SONG: Going Home, The Rolling Stones
THE PLACE: home
THE WORD: suck it, Manhattan Beach and your shitty ass parking set up.

Mikey, where in the hell are you? I'm about to make Spike the new VP so call me.

This is the funniest part of their site.

Whatever Wizard Ben.




"Ripping Off Sanger's Style": #23 Arthur Lee

ENTRY #1731
6/10/10

THE SONG: Never Say Never, Justin Bieber
THE PLACE: you never know
THE WORD: never

Gav, I only know this because I have a sister that went to modeling school and modeled at the local mall in Torrance, but whenever your head is twice the size of the other people that are going to be in a photo with you, stand behind them. It brings their head to the forefront of the photo and you appear smaller. You're welcome.




Wizard Ben, let's keep Zoey away from any NBA games on television this evening. No need for her to see you cry at such an innocent little age.

Just look under "OUR BRANDS" and you know what to boycott.

"Ripping Off Sanger's Style" #22: Terrence Trent Darby. I know, I know. But I saw him live once and his costumes were cool

ENTRY #1730
6/9/10

THE SONG: Slippin', DMX
THE PLACE: this column
THE WORD: sorry

Hersh, last time I'm going to ask, get that ice sock dildo thing that you said is for "sports purposes" out of the freezer. Freak

Hey Wizard Ben, you didn't let Zoey watch TV last night, did you? That's bad parenting, FYI.

"Ripping Off Sanger's Style" #21: Barbara Feldon....99

ENTRY #1729
6/2/10

THE SONG: Whatever, Godsmack
THE PLACE: who cares
THE WORD: yep

I knew Ben was going to have his baby right during the week when we are "re-doing" his office. Congrats to Ben and Jen on the arrival of Zoey! We love you.
(Her favorite colors are purple and gold if anyone wants to send gifts).

Hersh, that weird sock ice dildo you have in the fridge is disturbing. Think you can take that home? Thanks, pal.

Every time Rickk's basketball team has a game, he has a story about how he or Bird almost got in a fight. It's a rec center, Team Poor Sport, cool your jets.

"Ripping off Sanger's Style" #20: Annie Lennox