TUESDAY, JULY 06, 2004

Team Lakai is currently on tour in Canada. Here are some photographic updates from the one and only Kelly Bird.

Did you know that Hime has a financial planner? Yeah, it’s true.

If you ever let Tony Ferguson spend a weekend at your house prepare for the following; he’ll go get Thai massages with your chick, he’ll make you watch quality TV shows like The North Shore, and he’ll ice his foot at least once a day with whatever frozen foods you have in the freezer. Anytime, Tone.

Gav shook his "best friend" Matt Schnurr all weekend, forcing Schnurr to find some alternative lodging. Hide-A-Dook-Terror-Alert was on high this weekend for all those acquainted with Schnurr in the Los Angeles area.

"est" award of the day: The Scariest Part of Girl.


"I got connections, dude."
—Tony Larson on already having a copy of Fahrenheit 9/11


FRIDAY, JULY 02, 2004

>>We lost him

Today we launch the "est" award, where with each frequent installment, not daily, but almost, we showcase something that’s the coolest or the lamest or the worst-est thing at Crail/Girl Headquarters. If it sounds confusing don’t worry you’ll get the hang of it. Today’s "est" award is for the funnest part of Girl.

It’s pretty hot out today. A shit load of Fourstar shorts for cheap in the Crail Shop.

Ty’s Bachelor Barge round two!


"Now I’m ready to talk."
—Scott Johnston




>>Not even on the plane to Canada for the Lakai trip, Carroll called Girl for someone to send him some griptape, since he forgot to bring some. He must have been worried that the entire country of Canada wouldn’t have any grip up to his standards. He also made a preemptive doctor appointment before he left. You know, just in case. Don’t sweat the small stuff Mike.

Mini Top 5 with Mike Carroll
Top 5 worse case scenarios that go through Mike Carroll’s head before he goes on a trip:
1. That I’m gonna get strep throat
2. That I’ll get hurt and can’t skate
3. That I’ll get an anxiety attack on the plane
4. That I’ll experience some kind of iPod malfunction
5. My girlfriend won’t have the house clean when I get back

There should be a photo of Gav here, but it won't be here until tomorrow. It's Nick's fault.

The Bird ban has been lifted, unintentionally. One of his quotes slipped past our security system yesterday. Welcome back Bird. Expect some Lakai in Canada photo updates courtesy of the Bird. We used to call Bird The Birdman way before they started calling Tony Hawk that. Biters.

Girl park local, Brian Lotti, is having an art show this weekend, showcasing his art and a preview of his short film "1st and Hope" starring Kenny Anderson among others. The opening is at Groundwords Café, 811 Traction Ave, downtown Los Angeles, on Saturday July 3rd at 5p.m. Go meet the man who, some say, invented the big spin.


"Did Sal get Punk’d?"

"I don't trust that Canadian griptape."
—Mike Carroll



>> Is $6,000 in damages a lot when renting jet skis for only three hours? Is Atiba really the best person to drive a 50-foot houseboat? How lame is it be woken up with a super soaker full of ice water? Can you really catch a tortoise in a Vegas lake? These are all questions you’d be pondering if you went on Ty’s bachelor party. But if you didn’t, take a look at these photos. Keep in mind this is only the first in a two part series from Ty’s bachelor.

>> And a bonus from the trip, Ty back flipping (Quicktime, 2.3megs) from the roof of the boat. Extreme camera work by Koston.

>> There’s been a change to the Se Habla Canuck tour. The demo in Edmonton, Alberta has been moved from Famous to St. Albert. Let’s make sure that’s St. Albert skatepark and not Prince Albert Piercing Station. That place is sketchy.

>> Here at the Tap we’re all about bringing you the exclusive. So here’s a never before seen skate photo of Guy Mariano, circa ’98.

>> Pier 7 gone. Sorry Welsh.

>> Did you know on the East Coast that some people refer to Brian Anderson as Chuck?


"I think we could have gone head to head with any fraternity"
—Kelly Bird

TUESDAY, JUNE 29, 2004

>> We Have a Winner! About a week ago we asked the Crail readers to come up with a caption for this photo of Rickk when he was on tour in England. Before we announce the winner here’s some runner ups.
Marc C. went with the undead in London theme and captioned it "28 Days Later." That was the first one to make me laugh out loud. The fashion conscious, Tyler Britt came up with "Rick Howard, Arrested for Wearing $200 Jeans." But after some serious thought, we awarded the title of winner and the prize of one signed deck to Fernando Rodriguez Jr. It’s not really a caption, in the traditional sense, but we think it’s the best. Good job guys.

>> Last night Mike Carroll, of all people, rounded up a bunch of us to see Fahrenheit 9/11. He even called everyone and went early to buy us tickets. Unfortunately for Nick Tershay, he was under the impression that we were going to see the Day After Tomorrow. What? I guess since both have explosions and lots of people dying — albeit one movie shows real people dying and the other shows fake people dying — it’s pretty simple to see how Nick could have confused the two. Fahrenheit 9/11 has outsold White Chicks at the box office, and we were glad to contribute, except, maybe, for Nick.

>> The Ty bachelor party expose starts tomorrow. Gino almost skated to the Expose song "Show Me" for his part in Yeah Right! Thank God Ty talked him out of it.


"Canada is worthless. You’re all going to get sick."
—Rick Raymond, regarding the Se Habla Canuck tour

"I thought we were going to see the movie where New York freezes over."
—Nick Tershay

"I always remember the time I saw Henry Rollins modeling swim trunks in Details, that helps me keep it real like Atiba."

MONDAY, JUNE 28, 2004

>> Much like Lakai, a good portion of the Chocolate team will be touring Canada in July. The "Se Habla Canuck" tour will include Marc Johnson, who wears chords a lot; Kenny Anderson, who didn’t make it to Ty’s bachelor party; Scott Johnston, who did make it to Ty’s bachelor party; Gino Iannucci, who has a sexy NY accent according to the girl that sits next to me; Justin Eldridge, who has a brother that looks just like him, but with curlier hair, Devin Calloway, who I’ve never met; and Chris Roberts, who spent six months of the last two years in manual position.
Here’s the dates:

July 11: Kelowna BC: Island Snow

July 14: Calgary Alberta: The Source Skate Park

July 16: Edmonton Alberta: Famous

July 18: Saskatoon Saskatchewan: Clothes Café

July 19: Regina Saskatchewan: Tiki Room

>> Winner of Rickk Caption Contest will be announced tomorrow.

>> Do you know that after you’ve been on a houseboat for three days, when you sit at your computer it still feels like your swaying on the water? Trippy.


"Hey, check it out, he stole my Charleston Chew."
—John Buscemi

"Let’s take this thing to Sharky’s."
—Tone Ferguson

"How’d you get so good at Shuffleboard?"
—The Gav

"Where in the fuck are those photos on Crail coming from?"
—The Gav

FRIDAY, JUNE 25, 2004

>> The Gav week finaly! Simply titled: The Career Ender or The Bouncer on His Way Out for a Night’s Work or The Bull Dyke Who Grew a Flavor Saver. Gav it’s been a great week. We’ll end it with that.

>> Carroll and I were treated to a rare Sal Barbier sighting the other day. He moved to New York a couple of months ago, without telling anyone. We caught him on his way to a fashion show that Chad Muska was supposed to be in. Sal played Metallica’s "Fight Fire with Fire" on the acoustic guitar, showed us an anti-Laker email he tried to send to the Ring Ring Ringer, and then talked about how much he hated NY and loves LA. Nice seeing you Sal.

>> To expand our Top 5 repertoire we reached out to our good friend Mr. John Rattray. We’re not really reaching out, we just know that John’s bored at home doing leg exercises for his injured knee. So we gave him a Top 5. Get well soon.

>> I really wrote this yesterday. Today I’m on a houseboat with some of Ty’s closest 25, or so, friends. It’s amazing.


"I was dipping everything in cheese. Everything!"
—The Gav

"That’s hot."
—Nicole Ritchie


>> At the tender age of seven, Andy Jenkins’ son, Emmet, already has Pedro Pride. You’re well on your way to coolness, kid.

(click image for enlargement)

>> Gav Week number four. A more contemplative look for Gav. Unlike before he’s not addressing the camera. Maybe he had too many lemon drops the previous night. This is the last days of the Gav who still thrived off of skipping to the front of the line at the hottest Hollywood clubs. Today, that kind of enthusiasm is reserved for getting DVS T-shirts picked up for an "all store."

>> Sam Smyth, after an 18-year sponsorship dry spell—he briefly rode for Think when he was 13—has been added to the esteemed Skate Mental team. Welcome to the family, Smyth. Better start working on those noseslide nosegrinds. Staba’s not afraid to boot a homie.

>> One, of only two, of the non-drinkers going to Ty’s rager has backed out. Which begs the question, is it possible to simultaneously drive two houseboats?

>> Ten years ago, at the tender age of 19, Mike Carroll was awarded Thrasher Magazine’s Skate of the Year. Read the interview, in the Featured Feature section, about the trophy that changed Mikey’s life, forever.


"End Gav week now!"
—The Gav

"Who is that guy?"
—The Gav

"That’s how girls become bulimic."
—The Gav


>> The Tap today is rated X!

>> Gav Week part three. The nickname "Face" could have derived from this very picture. You gotta build the wall before you can hit the wall. Gav was laying some serious bricks in these days, circa ’96. Fake gold fronts made out of a Rolo wrapper? Why not?

>> With anticipation running high for Ty’s bachelor party this weekend. We thought we’d give the partygoers a quick briefing on the proper "dancer" etiquette. To do so we interviewed our resident man of leisure, Tony Larson.

Do you call them strippers or dancers?
They are absolutely dancers. They work very hard at what they do. They just happen to remove clothes as they do it. The reason I’m so tight with them is because I THINK like them, and they, most of them, believe they’re serious dancers. And so do I.

Overall what is the proper dancer etiquette?
Above all else, you must tip them well. A great way to make a professional dancer walk away is to be frugal. Frugality belongs in investment circles, but not in a strip club, my friend. The tipping, by the way, should include tons of great compliments on her skills and looks.

If you run out of money, what’s the preferred way to compensate a stripper for her services?
In the past I’ve used drugs and back stage passes to good rock gigs, but I really don’t recommend that. I suggest you hit your buddy up for some cash and call it a night.

In what city have you found has the classiest dancers?
It has to be Vegas. The women in that city are professional, determined, and beautiful. Many of them fly in just for the weekend, so for those couple of days they put their breast, I mean, best foot forward and really make you feel like a king. God bless them and their children. Orange County, CA is a distant second.

If you forget the young lady’s stage name, what should you use when addressing her?
I usually go with "sweetie" or "sweetheart." It’s a word they know well, and it resonates as sincere. You’re complimenting more than their looks, which is important. If they voluntarily give you their real name you must take this as a sign that your night may end considerably better than you had hoped.

Any words of advice for the gentleman that will be attending Ty’s bachelor party this weekend?
If you enter any of Vegas’ amazing strip clubs and the place is rocking, here’s a sure fire secret weapon. Pick a table close to the best stage, wave down one of the roaming security guys or cocktail waitresses and slip them $20-40 dollars. You will sit where you want AND you look like a champ in the eyes of the dancers. And believe me they’re watching.


Top 5 things Ty will be bringing to his own bachelor party
1. Bud Light
2. Veggie burgers (pizza flavor)
3. Knuggs mp3
4. Emergency syringe of mosquito bite antidote for Ako
5. The pain


"Post a photo of me now, so I can stare at myself for a while."

"Yeah, he was good."
—The Gregulator reminiscing about which former team riders were fun to kick off

TUESDAY, JUNE 22, 2004

>> For our second installment of Gav Week, we decided to showcase the "easy going, free flowing" side of Gav. Here he is on South Beach, in Miami, circa 1998. His hair is teased to Florida code. The figaro chain worn on the outside of his Matix Tee shows his versatility for beach life and street culture. Thumbs up to signify that everything is "A-OK" down on South Beach. And he’s got The Cheeks riding shotgun. Keep on keepin’ on Gav. We’ll see ya tomorrow.

Smyth’s in the midst of a serious month of leisure. First it was London with the boys. Then it was South of France with his lady. And this past weekend was camping out at the Sierra Nevada World Music Festival, a reggae fest for a crowd of white people in mountains. As always, Smyth make’s sure his party time is well documented. And, remember, next weekend is Ty’s four-day bachelor party. Wow!

>> Lakai’s headed north next week for a quick tour of Canada. Rick Howard, Mike Carroll, Danny Garcia, Jeff Lenoce and Anthony Pappalardo will be stopping at the following locals to sign autographs and do some serious demo damage:

July 2, Quebec City: In-Store at Exo/Demo at Arena Les Saules

July 3, Trois Rivieres: In-Store at Perigny

July 4, Montreal: In-Store at Empire/Demo at South Parc

July 6, Ottawa: Demo at McNabb Skatepark

July 8, Mississauga: Demo at Mississauga Skateboard Park

July 10, Oshawa: Demo at Oshawa Skatepark

>> On our lunch break, Rickk and I skated Pedroside and a shitty park down the street from Girl, that had this cool kid hanging out. He knew who Rickk was and that he had just gotten back from England, and that it was raining there. He also knew what kind of shoes Donny Barley skates in, Nike Anguses. Rick gave him a set of wheels.

>> If you haven’t downloaded Ty’s clip of the Oi! Meets Girl Tour, do so now. It takes a while, but you never know when a new feature might bump it.


"Who cleans the pole after the strippers leave?"
—Mueller’s better half concerned about cleanliness

"Mihaly would be stoked, I guess Blink 182 came in our store and bought some stuff this weekend."
—Anne Huf

"I don’t think guys think strippers ever over stay their welcome."
—Spike explaining why a pole in the room is sort of a good idea

MONDAY, JUNE 21, 2004

>> Gav’s back from his Phish weekend, where he was the envy of all his hip-hopping friends, when none other than Jay-Z joined the jam band on stage.

>> As promised we are launching our first installment of Gav week. We’re calling it
Shocking Images of Gav. At the time this photo was taken, it was probably cool outside, they’re in the shade, and everyone else has their shirts on, but of course Gav, whose body temperature is at least 15 degrees hotter than anybody else, is sweating up a storm. It’ s probably because he just finished eating or something.

Who ever comes up with the best caption for this photo, by next Monday, will win a signed Girl deck that’s been sitting in my office. Good luck and come sick. Thanks Mr. Powell, for the photo.


Tony’s Top 5 Canadian Comedians
1. Phil Hartman
2. Mike Myers
3. Eugene Levy
4. John Candy
5. Dave Chappelle (born in Saskatoon)

>> You ever lug around a two hundred pound handrail all over town for two days, and you don’t even skate handrails. Yeah, it’s a good way to spend a weekend.


"Who is that guy?"

"You looking for something to do?"

"Looked at it for two minutes and couldn’t understand a thing on there."
—Dawes on the Tap

FRIDAY, JUNE 18, 2004

>> Saw Koston last night at Rite Aid buying a lot of toilet paper. Take a look at his Top 5s.

>> Phelper and Staba are boys!

>> Carroll’s making good use of his morning by emailing people photos of Britney Spears in Playboy. I tried to explain to him that they are most likely fakes and that if she did pose for Playboy wouldn’t it be all over the news. Little guy still wanted to believe it though. Where would Mike be without these three people, who shaped his life in so many ways, Tupac Shakur, Eminem, and, of course, Britney?

>> Next Monday through Friday it’s Gav time.


“I know every skater.”
—Nick Diamond, the guy who sponsors every skater

“I feel like my life took a bad turn.”-Meg

“You can’t go Phishing alone.”
—Dimitry on why Gav paid for Rudy and Hime’s Phish tickets


>> Smyth finally came back today. He left weeks ago for the Oi! Meets Girl tour in Great Britain. Then when everyone else came home, he extended his trip and met up with his lady in Nice, France. I guess Smyth needed a little vacation time, since skating around England with your friends for two weeks isn’t really a vacation. That’s work. Hard work.
To celebrate his triumphant return, we let Smyth reminisce about his days spent on the beaches of the Mediterranean, by giving us a Mini Top 5. We know he really wants a full Top 5s, but it’s not gonna happen.


Top 5 reasons for going topless on the French Riviera:
1. Blinding Frenchies with my alabaster skin.
2. I was the only one with tats.
3. My tits looked small next to my lady’s.
4. I was able to locate some 65spf lotion.
5. Ran out of clean tees.

>> If anybody had any questions about whether Christian Hosoi was going to be able to skate or not after being locked up, well here’s your answer (photo courtesy

>> Somebody took the time to give PJ Ladd’s part from the "Really Sorry" DVD and give it some music and a reedit. Check it out, it’s pretty sick.

>> Yesterday we tried to skate downtown LA and got stuck in deadlock traffic. Imagine three dudes, in three separate cars, taking 30 minutes, to go three blocks. You just imagined our day yesterday. To top it off it was the running of the Olympic torch that caused the bumper-to-bumper. Bob Burnquist skated with the torch in Athens, Greece before it made its way to downtown LA.


"You get 20 frat assholes on a house boat and Meza isn’t going to be able to do anything. Come on, does Rick listen to Meza?"
—The Gav about Meza chaperoning Ty’s bachelor party

"What are these people’s party budget? And make sure you got Gavin in a life jacket."


>> Outside of dodging homicidal maniacs, Ty found it in his schedule to edit a short film on the Oi! Meets Girl Tour. Dill’s boy Mikey is gonna be psyched. The video is in our revised Featured Feature column (over there on the other side of the screen).

>> Recently, IASC (International Association of Skateboard…don’t know what the "C" stands for, could be wrong about the "I", the "S" and the "A" too) had a meeting at the end of the Huntington Beach Pier, where they forgot to invite Rickk, again. They used to invite him, but maybe because he never showed up, they’re over him. He’d probably just sit in the back passing gas and looking confused anyway.

>> Star of The Hot Chocolate Tour, manual expert, and Malibu’s most wanted, Chris Roberts has graced us with an interview. Click the little cloud below titled "Roberts" to read more.

>> Gav, Hime, and Rudy are boarding a redeye flight to NY tonight to catch some of Phish’s last shows, as it is their farewell tour, much to Gav’s dismay. Don’t worry Gav, I think Dave Mathews is still touring, and maybe even the Dead, without Jerry.

>> Remember, next week, all week, is Gav week.


"I’m in the middle of fucking cutting my hair right now."

"Who’s ordering the bunnies, Atiba?"

TUESDAY, JUNE 15, 2004

>> Top 5s (where David Cross still reigns supreme) will have its own section soon. Koston Top 5 coming soon.

>> Speaking of Koston, depending on tonight’s outcome, he may be over this whole Lakers thing. But until then he’s still a fan. So much so that the NBA tracked him down for this online interview.

>> Intelligent, dangerous, boyish good looks. What’s not to love about Spike? Apparently Stephanie Trong, from that growing-old-ungracefully-rag, Jane Magazine thinks the same way. Notice how Spike is bigger than everybody else in the photo. That’s one way to get a date Stephanie.

>> Nick Diamond’s ladyfriend, Elle, has landed the job of host of an AOL radio show. It’s called Thug Poet and plays nothing but Tupac all day, every day. Wow! Do I hear wedding bells?

>> Starting next week, we’re coming in hot with The Gav. It’s gonna be huge.


"If I was in the NBA finals, I would try a lot harder then the Lakers are."

"What’s this show called Blonde Retards?"
—Rickk, watching For Love or Money

MONDAY, JUNE 14, 2004

>> This last Friday night, Koston was host to a wild game of Texas Hold ’Em. Tony Ferguson, despite having no idea on how to compose a poker hand, came up $70 and things got a little heated when The Gav threatened to call Schnurr to back him up on the rules of the game. The call was never made and Gav walked away $10 poorer.

>> After a brief hiatus, Stevie Williams is back on Diamond.

>> has posted some classic ads feature some Girl/Chocolate alumni. Tim Gavin 20 pounds lighter and ink free. Sheffey boosting over a fence for Speed Wheels. And Minirats Paulo, Gabe, Rudy, and Guy

>> There’s a garage sale in front of Ty’s apartment every weekend. And outside of the occasional drunk driver that careens off Hollywood Boulevard and into Ty’s building, it’s normally a pretty quiet area. That is until this weekend, when a double homicide occurred just four doors down from the Evans’ residence. Sketchy! Is this a little too morbid for the Tap?


Rudy’s Top 5 songs to cover on guitar
1. "Don’t Panic," Cold Play
2. "Is There Anybody Out There," Pink Floyd
3. "Creeping Death," Metallica
4. "Strawberry Fields Forever," The Beatles
5. Any classical guitar song

>> Next time you’re reading the Lakai news check out the Zine section of the site to browse through some of their recent zine/catalogs.


"You gotta hit it, dude."
—Rudy on going to a club called Jamaican Gold this weekend

FRIDAY, JUNE 11, 2004

>> Smyth’s got another run of flicks. This time it’s back to London for the wind down of the Oi! Tour. Thanks to Sidewalk and Warrior for the good times.

1> Biebel erects a 30-foot trash bag. One of his most thrilling experiences of the trip.

2> Jereme tries out bondage. He seems into it.

3> Floating Street Skater of the Year head.

4> Final night festivities.

5> From BA to MJ, and all the good blokes we met along the way, thank you for making this trip off the hook. Oi!

Mike’s getting rid of his Escalade. Thank God. It was getting embarrassing to even be the designated driver of such a vehicle. Riding shotgun was pretty shameful too. So now he’s getting a 745 BMW or as he called it "a quarter to eight." Get it, as in 7:45? Quarter to eight. Way to keep it Hip-Hop Mike. He’s getting it from Ritchie Belton’s dad. For real.

David Cross Top 5 in the Featured Feature. Did we mention that yet?

Johannes Gamble booked the Nokia gig. Here he is doing his best tweaked ollie (the same one he used to win CASL contests with, 25 and older, unsponsored division) on Scooch’s Chocolate board. We expect to see a spike in sales on that model thanks to this billboard on Melrose.

Currently there is a bidding war going on between Record Collection Music and Sub Pop for the official record label of the Tap. We’ll see.


"I don’t know. I don’t know if I could deal with that guy."
—Jereme when asked if he’s going to move in with Carroll


>> Rudy Johnson’s wife Pam is the coolest. Girls who have never met her even want to hang with her. So we demanded she fill out a survey.

(click image for enlargement)

As a bonus to the Johnson family, here is a photo of Rudy and Pam with their son Diego, who celebrated his fourth birthday by riding on Splash Mountain for the first time. Yeah, he was scared shitless.


And guess what, we stand corrected.
MIKE TODD from Welland, Ontario, Canada, did win. He pulled that mess together and blew Scott’s mind with his color-coded organization of his shoeboxes. Congrats Mike. Here’s what you’ll be getting in the mail.

Competition was tough so here’s some runner ups.
Jordan Marty’s prison cell from Melbourne Florida.

Jonathan Labrucherie’s minimal living space, but with attention to detail. And...

a very close second to Mr. Swiffer himself,
Dirk. Here he is with his tools. This is the result.

>> Raymond is on tour with a rock band. He’s in Texas and skating with guitarist James Iha, of the Smashing Pumpkins. And Twiggy from Marlyn Manson is with them too. Weird.

>> Comedian
David Cross has a Top 5 in the Featured Feature section. Down there to the right.


"He drives really slow. REALLY slow."
—Rick about The Mez

"She puts regular trash in the recycling bin, it drives me crazy."
—The Gav about his maid

"That place makes you want to sweat."
—Scott Johnston


>> Mike and Greg Carroll’s cousin, Brendan Charles Murphy, has taken credit for introducing them to skateboarding. They were rocker kids at the time. Mike claims that Brendan could have went pro. Now he’s a drunk firefighter/paramedic. Sounds scary.

(click image for enlargement)

>> Field Editor Smyth with yet another series of snapshots. This time they’re in Leeds. And this time things are getting a little more Rock-n-Roll.

1> Ty and the best damn air guitarist in the world

2> Big Owen has got the posse’s back

3> Young Beebs, takin’ down the Big O

4> Biebel takes down Neil to secure his spot at the top

5> MJ and his new accessories

>> Mini Top 5 with Daniel Castillo

1. Joey Tran
2. Eric "Tuma" Britton
3. Jesse Martinez
4. Jef Hartsel
5. Eric "Little Man" Garber

>> The Gav has been banned, kicked off, forbidden, disqualified, expelled, and shunned from the Tap for his behavior. So Bird, unfortunately, everyone’s gotta abide by the same rules. When your bearded mug dons the pages of TWS Skate Business (see below), that’s grounds for a ban. See you around Bird…Oh, yeah, Reda and The Lix are peaced-out too.


"You didn’t even mention me yesterday. You were snapping photos all day! I was money!"
The Gav disappointed that he wasn’t on the Tap yesterday after he bought lunch

"I’m gonna start skating and then I’m gonna rip."
—Nick Tershay


>> Smyth, like a good little field reporter, checked in and got back to us with a full journalistic report. The Scotland files:

1> Even MJ knows Sherm is a little suspect.

2> Jereme’s lookin’ like a million quid, at the Focus shop signing.

3> A couple Scots just tryin’ to make it to the Tap.

4> MJ’s alternative lifestyle sometimes includes alternative transportation.

5> Sherm goes totally Cockney.

6> Pillow Art part one, just the beginning.

7> Pillow Art part two, Biebel’s addition. Pillow Art three, "Sherm City," not suitable for the Tap.

8> Ty gets ready for lift off.

9> A smashing good posse.

>> Over the years Megan has learned not to mix family with business. So here she walks the line with her big sis Susan Baltimore. Read her Survey:

(click image for enlargement)

Nick’s mom said "No way" to filling out a Crail Survey. She also said the questions were ridiculous. The Tershay’s are gansta through and through.

>> This was on the back of a Jeep parked on the street in front of headquarters. Torrance is a hell of a place.

>> Mike Todd from Welland, Ontario, Canada is guaranteed not to win the Chocolate Backpack Personally Packed by Scott Johnston Contest, for having the cleanest room. Scooch wouldn’t sneeze in this here. Thanks for sending anyway Mike.


"The Lakers are wack."

"Everything has gotten so clever."

MONDAY, JUNE 7, 2004

>> Here’s Smyth’s third, and possibly final, installment from the Girl’s trip through the United Kingdom. Smyth if you’re checking in, that’s your cue to send more photos. The boys do Newcastle:

1> Brian spots a cock on the McDonald’s chick.

2> Sherm’s suspect van antics are getting out of control. This is the only postable photo. Hit up Carroll for the uncut shit, if you’re into sketchy young boys.

3> Newcastle’s number one Girl fan. Thanks for showing, little buddy.

4> At the end of this rainbow was a skatepark on the beach. No photos, but I promise it was a blast.

>> Scott Johnston came in to pack the prize for the Crail reader with the cleanest room. Take a look at what you’ll win. The deadline is June 10, so get those photos in. Send to: or snail mail to 22500 S. Vermont, Torrance, CA 90502.

>> Nick Tershay and Stacy G. were in a heated debate over which concert they attended last week was better. He saw Madonna and she saw Prince. Nick reported that Madonna had vert skater Sergie Ventura, with a Mohawk and eye makeup, skating a ramp, as part of her stage show, while Stacy G. talked about Prince playing "Little Red Corvette" on his acoustic guitar. Nick gave a convincing and passionate reenactment of Sergie’s stage performance, but Stacy talks louder. So Prince wins for having the best concert out of the two pop icons. It’s Prince’s birthday today, too.

>> Speaking of Prince and Madonna, upon being released from jail, Christian Hosoi went straight to the Aala Park Boardshop in Hawaii and set up a stick. And of course, Nick is pretty stoked that he’s got a Diamond sticker on his board.

>> I don’t post the photos on the front page. Just want to clear that one up. And if I did I certainly wouldn’t have picked one where I have such a big double chin.


"Such a gross display of money."
—Kelly Bird

"Madonna was sick dude!"
—Nick Tershay

FRIDAY, JUNE 4, 2004

>> CHRISTIAN HOSOI IS GETTING OUT OF JAIL! That’s right, Holmes will be finally released from prison next Wednesday, in Honolulu. Shakas all the way around. A childhood friend of mine bought a very used Hosoi Hammerhead for $25. And after about a week I took it and slammed the tail on a curb, making a V-shaped chip in the tail. Pretty lame. My other Hosoi story is that I heard in the mid-80s he hopped out of a limo at a demo, grabbed a female fan and kissed her. Supposedly she fainted on the spot and Hosoi said, "Whew, out cold!" Then he ripped the demo. That’s how it was in the ’80s.

>> It’s official. Gino is moving back to LA. He’ll be here by the middle of the month. East Coast fans don’t fret; he’s keeping his place in Long Island as well.

>> Here’s Smyth second around of Oi! Meets Girl Tour. This batch is from Milton Keynes:

1> B.A. on the bus floor, with a banana-peel pillow.

2> M.J. and the "shocker." If he had hair, it would be standing on end.

3> Caught slippin’ at the mall. The team endures an impromptu autograph signing.

4> Ty’s in the mood to frolic amongst the lush greenery.

5> Ty’s rollin’ in on one sweet ditch.

6> Rick came up on like five free games of bowling, from these scratchers.

7> By the time we tried to redeem our free games bowling had closed for the night. That didn’t stop Cory from going head first down this lane.

>> There are two massive full pipes on the flatbed of two semi trucks, parked in the middle of the street, right around the corner from Girl. Despite maximum bust factor the ever so dangerous Scott Johnston had to give them a test run (mpg 248k) .


>> Tap Editor at Large, Sam Smyth has blessed us with his first in a series of correspondence from the Oi! Meets Girl Tour. First stop London, England:

1> Welcome to London. Ty picks up a new trick axe, and holds on to his trusty cruiser.

2> What would the boys at Slam City Skates think if they found out Chico rocks Von Dutch mesh?

3> Carroll waiting for a flood, E.A. just psyched to be there.

4> B.A. and the Tower Bridge.

5> Rickk on a chick’s head.

6> Carroll givin’ some head.

7> Sherm facial.

8> An Embarconian reunion - Smyth and Femi Bukanola.

>> One time I picked up Chris Keeffe to go skating and when he was getting into my car he ripped his new Gap cords on the door. He got so pissed that he punched the roof of my car. Then he felt bad and said, "Sorry." Now he, his brother John, and Dave Ortiz have opened there own store called Dave’s Quality Meats. Between the three of them, at least one of them has held the following job title: pro skater, real estate mogul, shop clerk, theater ticket agent, sales manager, and aspiring porn star. Now they sell shoes, clothes, and some boards. Check out their store if you’re in the New York area. It’s at 7 East Third Street. New York, NY. Chris, I expect a box of shirts at Girl by early next week. Size XL (and L —Sanger).

>> There’s something of a ’80s pop revival going on here at Girl. Nick Diamond is going to see Madonna and won’t shut up about it. And Meg, Charlene, and Stacy are going to see Prince this Saturday. Yeah, we got a pretty tough staff over here. If Larson doesn’t go to like a Maiden and Dio double bill type of thing this summer anything tough about Girl could be lost.

>> The Christian skate company that Jeremy Carnahan rode for was aptly titled 777. He only got one complete from them and was stoked that it had Indys on it.

>> Chris Roberts interview coming soon.


"The Vice President is sleeping next to me."

"Start a cool rumor about me."

"There’s always one asshole everywhere."

"No, dude, I’m going to the Madonna concert."
—Nick Diamond on why he can’t skate today


>> Christian Hosoi is scheduled for a parole hearing tomorrow, says one of our reliable sources (the Slap Message Boards). It’s been nearly six years since Hosoi was sent to the belly of the beast. We at the Tap believe Holmes has paid his debt to society and wish him the best at tomorrow’s hearing. He could do rocket method airs, that’s gotta be grounds for a at least a year off his sentence.

>> On the way to work there was a guy fully asleep, with a cigeratte dangling in his mouth, in the lane next to me, on the 101 freeway. Luckily it was stop and go traffic. I gave him a honk; he woke up, took a power puff, and just kept driving.

Top 5 things to do while waiting for Carroll to finish stretching:

1. Get a Starby’s
2. Look at his latest home furnishing purchase
3. Skate the Brooklyn Projects mini
4. Give my hotmail a quick once over
5. Spot him (just kidding)

>> I’ve never watched Fear Factor


"I don’t know, and to be honest, I don’t really f--king care."
—Kelly Bird

"Fat face Gavin ruined the whole thing!"

"I got sponsored by a Christian skate company once and I was totally drunk at the time."
—Jeremy Carnahan


>> In an attempt to expand the Bird Brand, Kelly Bird has launched a website.

>> Hime is up to something, and it’s not road repping. We’ll find out tomorrow.

>> Atiba showed me a slideshow, on his laptop, with a Tribe Called Quest song playing along to it, of his new two-story house. Remember when Atiba was just the guy they’d send to SF to film Huf. And remember, on that same trip, he was supposed to hook-up with Carroll but Carroll flaked on him. Well now he’s buying house number two.

>> Scott made a power move over the weekend. Congratulations bud.

>> Lakers are in the finals. Not sure what that means.

>> A few people are concerned about Gino’s whereabouts, so here’s an update: He’s trying to find an apartment in LA while he’s in NY. Sounds difficult. And he skated Flushing Meadows today by himself.

>> Ty’s got a new bod that he’s real into right now. Take a look.


"As soon as I get there I feel like getting out."

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